Sunday Setup
A weekly newsletter to help get your mind set up for a positive workweek.
06.15.2025 — Chaotic Checkout
999 Problems
Nowadays, just about every store has a row of self-checkout registers, which are intended to be convenient and save time. Unfortunately, sometimes they aren't and they don't.
Last week a Walmart customer had an arresting meltdown after mistakenly overcharging himself for avocados. The unidentified man attempted to enter 9 as the quantity of fruit he wanted to purchase, but somehow typed 999, causing the register to display $1,300 as the total. Having experienced an error earlier during checkout when the register rang up a $9.99 item for $19.99, the four digit mischarge mishap inspired a four letter word filled tirade.
The self-checkout checker instantly became irate — perhaps because he knew all 999 avocados would go bad before he could even bag them — and began loudly hurling a flurry of flagrant accusations at Walmart for allegedly robbing him. Multiple attempts by employees to deescalate and resolve the issue were unsuccessful, and eventually resulted in a 911 call — from the customer.
Shortly after arriving at the "scene of the crime," the apoplectic avocado accumulator engaged the cops in a difficult conversation, informing them that he deserved to be compensated for his "pain and suffering." Instead, he was subjected to the pain of handcuffs, as he was arrested for trespassing after ignoring several requests to leave the store.
Apparently, in addition to low prices Walmart also has low tolerance — for temper tantrums. Perhaps next time he'll choose a different Target for his frustrations.
If I Could Turn Back Time
Most people dislike confrontation and try to avoid it at all costs, but sometimes it's just unavoidable. Whenever multiple people gather to work together, multiple personalities, opinions, experiences, and egos naturally come along for the ride. Those unique and different character traits don't always work well together, sometimes creating challenging work environments that require difficult conversations to resolve.
Thankfully the environments in which I've worked throughout my career have been more cooperative than combative, however, I once reported to a manager who repeatedly pushed my buttons. His consistently inconsistent direction and huge ego accompanied by an abrasive tone made it rather difficult to focus on the task at hand, which was delivering quality work for our clients.
Unfortunately, because I ran into Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde early in my career — i.e. before I discovered mindfulness — I allowed that contentious environment to extinguish my zest for life. I was often miserable at work and at home because I wasn't adequately prepared, nor confident enough, to address the issue head on. But if time travel were possible, I would go back and offer myself some mindful guidance, like:
Observe — and Control — Your Nervous System
Frustration can often trigger fight or flight feelings, which cause your heart rate to rise and your breath to shorten. When you find yourself in a tense, emotional conversation — or you're anticipating one — focus on physiology. Try to remain calm, so you can think clearly, by bringing awareness to your breathing and your thoughts.
Focus on the Facts
Stressful conversations often pull us into assumptions, past resentment, or imagined intentions. Ask yourself, "What are the facts?” or “What story am I adding that might not be true?” Focus on observable behavior, not character judgments, to help you stay composed and constructive.
Use "I" Not "You"
Confidently — and calmly — express how you feel and what you need. Try not to say things like, “You never communicate clearly.” Instead, say something like, “I felt confused by the direction you provided. Can we further discuss so I can gain more clarity?”
Debrief and Self-soothe Afterward
Regardless of whether you handled it well, difficult conversations can leave psychological residue. Take some time to emotionally reset by asking yourself questions like:
- What went well?
- What could I do differently next time?
- What did I learn about myself?
Essentially, I would remind my younger self that remaining calm during difficult conversations may be challenging, but will be effective in the long run, from a productive and mental standpoint.
Also, young William, remember that responding mindfully isn't about being passive or suppressing emotions. It's about staying grounded and present, which can help you build trust, credibility, and emotional resilience. Armed with those three things, you should be able to handle just about anything Dr. Jekyll — or Mr. Hyde — throws at you.